The Mowrey Family is more an idea than an exclusive group of people. In fact, for a small fee anyone can join. There are different entry points to the Mowrey Family designed to accomodate your personal comfort level. For example, a basic membership can be obtained by simply buying the beer one night, or inviting us over for food. Or, with a bit more effort, you could become part of the Mowrey Leadership Circle. This involves sticking around for cleanup after everyone else has left the party. Besides all the perks of a basic membership, this level of support entitles you to periodic use of the couch, as well as limited access to the personal stashes of Senior Members. (Note: Senior Membership cannot be purchased -- it is awarded on a "last-man-standing" basis, and can only be acquired over time.) Finally, for those really itching to donate, we offer a Platinum Membership. This involves setting up a living trust that funds inane Mowrey functions in perpetuity. There is more, but the FCC, DEA, FBI, CIA, NSA and Homeland Security prevent me from speaking freely of all the joys and obligations associated with this level of participation. For details, please use a pay phone to contact a Senior Member.